Who are you? What are you about? Can you clearly articulate a response? When I ask these questions, I don't mean your name, your job title or your marital status. All those are labels. I am talking about who you are at your core. If you don't know, it might be time to find out. Going through life with no idea who you are is like living your entire life in badly fitted clothes. To make things worse, if you have no idea who you are, the world will waste no time in telling you who you need to be. And when the world dictates who you should be, it changes you into what it needs, which more than likely will have zilch to do with who you truly are. So, the best thing you can do for yourself is to know and to be who you are, even if there is a likelihood of disappointing others. Life is too short to live a life that belongs to someone else. So, I ask: Whose life are you living right now?

As much as feedback from others with regards to how they see us is valuable, we must never allow ourselves to be consumed by what people say that we are. What they have is simply an opinion which they are 100% entitled to. It is who we believe that we are that makes a big difference as all our actions stem from how we see ourselves. To be oneself is to be free and unencumbered. To be what we are not means a life of struggle and bondage. Trying to keep up an act is terribly exhausting. And what we water tends to grow, so managing and tending to a different persona often results in one forgetting oneself in the process. We must never change so people will like us. Instead, we must strive to become ourselves and the right people would love us. When we are the same in private and in public, we are able to go through life unimpeded because no one can ever be better at being anything or anyone else than themselves.

It is imperative that we learn to love and accept who we are where we are right now. Even if we've had negative experiences happen to us, it is important to come to terms with them as its both the positive and negative experiences that make us who we are. We can choose who we want to become regardless of what may have happened to us in the past. Rather than look down on ourselves because of our scars, let’s see our blemishes as a sign of immense and incredible strength. Maybe if we can start to own our scars, we can use them as stepping stones to greatness.

We are all perfect imperfections. We are all flawed in one way or another. We all have secrets and blind spots. No-one is perfect. We all have work to do because we are on a journey and will continue to be until the very end. In essence, we are all becoming. Being yourself requires courage. It means you are completely satisfied with dancing to no-one else's tune but your own. It means being totally okay with not being liked because liking yourself and living a life of integrity holds more weight in your view than the approval of others.

Using the words of André Gide, "It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not." To be fine with yourself at your level is a beautiful and powerful thing. It has been said that, "It is better to be a great sergeant than a poor general." Being an excellent version of yourself at whatever level you are at, will always trump a mediocre version of someone else.

Smile. It's time to celebrate yourself; to own who you are even as you grow and improve; to appreciate how far you've come; to believe that there is value in you just as you are. Raise your head. Stand tall and push your shoulders a little further back. You may not be where you want to be but thank God you are not where you used to be. Love and accept yourself right here, right now. There is no need to wait until you get 'better'. Who has defined 'better' for you anyway? 'Better' must be something you define for yourself so you can embrace your journey to whatever that might be.